Recession

The compliments are coming thick and fast at the moment. Our man in China asked for a picture of me and this was his reply:

"You look as a handsome,robust,kindness man I think."

Of course, I am his customer, so there just may be a touch of sycophancy there...

Anyway, today is a day when Mrs. Lear goes to Yoga.

There are two distinct classes, the Blingers, and what she calls the Norms & Nicies.

The Blingers mostly drive black 4x4s, and get very upset if the perfect line up outside the class is broken by eg a Ford.

They arrive late and chatter.

They've all had breast enhancement. How can you tell? When they lie on their backs, their boobs stick straight up.

The Norms & Nicies on the other hand, turn up on time, concentrate on their Yoga, their boobs meld into their chests when they lie on their backs, and generally drive ordinary cars.

And they don't care where or how they are parked.

The point of this story is that the Blingers are slowly but surely diminishing in number.

This is the direct result of the present economic conditions. Some of the 4 x 4s have gone. The husbands are either having to put more money into their businesses, have lost their jobs, or, if partners in law firms,have no net salary this year.

These are the people who would normally keep the economy growing by their spending habits, but these are the very people who have been hardest hit.

The Banks, of course, have been waiting for the little glimmer of hope so they can start liquidating any problem loans ( they don't do it at the bottom, only when it starts to improve). They've also been hugely encouraged by the Basel III bank ratios, as to all intents and purposes all UK banks are well within the parameters.

Which would make you think they would start lending again.

But of course not. As someone recently told his bank manager:

" Listen, if you hadn't caused the problem in the first place, you wouldn't be causing us ALL problems now!"

PS In case you are unsure, this is NOT a picture of me. I am far more handsome... and incredibly modest.