I just love it here.

I spent another morning in the house in Alma Vii fighting off people wanting useless tat from the house. Clearly I have no understanding of real life.When a lady of indeterminate vintage assured me she would sleep with me if only I would sell her the kitchen cupboard, and Alin was too too embarrassed to translate, I knew I had stepped into a timewarp that was completely beyond me.
We resolved that particular problem by saying it was sold and making a phone call to a friendly rubbish dealer in Sighisoara, who said he would take it -0h, and anything else we would like to sell. We gave up at that point and waited for his van to arrive.
We had estimated the entire collection at Eur 1000, but the sales in situ had raised nearly Eur 3000, and another Eur 1000 or so was promised by the "antiques dealer" in Sighisoara. He was particularly taken with a deep red vase, which, in Ceaucesu's time, had only been made for export, but which now was enormously coveted within the country.
The Mayor, having entertained us yesterday, had left with various papers for Bucharest at 4am this morning. We had arranged to give he and his wife, the chain-smoking Tina ( food tastes much better with ash in it) dinner in Sighisoara as he made his way back.
We collected Tina when Eugene was about 1 hr out, and arrived just in time for lunch at Casa Cu Cerb in Sighisoara at 530 pm.
He had with him his side-kick Cornel, whose particular speciality is the polenta made over an open fire and the chips deep fried in oil over the same fire. Cornel was only there to drive the Mayor & Tina the relatively short distance from Sighisoara back to Mosna. But he is a cheery soul and likes the prestige of being with the Mayor. He regards himself as his bodyguard, although anyone stupid enough to assault the Mayor would be lucky to escape with mere multiple fractures. Eugene used to play professional football in Romania, which makes SAS combat drill look like pat-a-cake.
We had an excellent meal. You may recall my mentioning tuica before now, which is rot-gut of the vilest nature which, after a few, assumes a pleasant blandness brought on by complete inebriation. Casa Cu Cerb serves a tuica that has been aged for MORE THAN 2 MONTHS, which, when the very best stuff is about 3 weeks old, assumes an aura of near sainthood. The Mayor, Tina and I downed about half a pint each before we even thought about food, but, fortunately, I had eaten a few fornettini in the later afternoon, knowing the requirements of later in the day.
I won't bore you with the meal: I will tell you why the Mayor had to shoot off to Bucharest at such short notice.
Money from the EU is allocated within Romania by the Government. Eugene is at a disadvantage as his political party controls neither the President nor the House ( and I use those words advisedly about the President.) However, because he is very smart, he only ever asks for 85% for any given project whilst his opponents keep asking for 100% and get knocked back. Obviously there is then a cost overrun....
Anyway, he has secured funds for a new school in Mosna, and he decided to have attached to it a new sports centre for the whole area - this is very definitely encouraged by the EU. We in the UK have buggered up the whole thing by the wholesale destruction of playing fields.
In Mosna, however, the Mayor has nurtured a perfect area for a football playing field, sports complex, changing rooms, basketball, etc etc. All therequired papers were already into Bucharest some weeks ago.
On Thursday morning he received a call from the Ministry dealing with these matters.
" Ah domno Primar ( ah Mr. Mayor) we are delighted with your excellent proposal. There is only one thing missing."
Eugene was taken aback... he had included everything.
" I'm sorry. What would that be???????"
" There is no mention of Mosna's football team."
"Excuse me? What has that got to do with having a football field and sports complex?"
" If you don't have a football team, you don't need a football field, and therefore you don't need a sports complex."
As Reggie Perrin's boss would have said " I didn't get to be where I am today without...".
Eugene knew he had to come up with the answer, because funding closed midnight 31st August ( Why do people do that? What's wrong with 5pm Friday 29th?)
" Ah its on paper number xyz."
" We don't have that."
"Are you sure? It's definitely there. I delivered it myself on Tuesday". Great shuffling of papers.
" No no, we definitely don't have it."
Eugene did his impression of outraged rectitude, all to no avail.
" Right - I will deliver another copy tomorrow morning."
So Eugene, Vasily,Cornel, Dorel and Andrea, the girl who actually does the work, spent until Alin and I turned up for lunch at 5pm , when everyone decamped to the Mayor's house and Andrea was left to produce the relevant paper. In Romania, loo seats are ALWAYS raised.
We finished lunch about 8pm, just as Andrea staggered through the main gate clutching various papers, which the Mayor signed with a flourish and offered her a slice of water melon. She refused it on the grounds she wasn't " loved up" at the moment and didn't want to sleep with just anyone. This is not something I understood, but Alin assures me water melon is a great aphrodisiac. I tend to think Eugene was trying to help the hopeless love Nico has for her, but for the life of me I can't imagine why.
Anyway, Eugene and Cornel set off at 4am and did the 5 and a half hour drive in just over 3, so were on the door step of the ministry as it opened at 7am. They handed in the paper, the ministry man stamped all the papers, handed them back and assured Eugene his funding would be forthcoming.
At dinner I asked who was in the football team of Mosna. It seems Mutu ( Romania's greatest player who plays in Italy) David Beckham ( LA Galaxy) Stephen Gerrard ( Liverpool) and Ronaldinho ( Man U) all play for Mosna. When available.
Unfortunately, this is not often.
But the rest of the team is MOST assiduous and is only needing a proper field to take on the likes of Steaua Bucharest, Real Madrid and the Mayor's personal favourite, Dynamo Bucharest, and the Mayor avers in his funding proposal that he personally will GUARANTEE that the first game on the ground will be attended by every member of the Ministry concerned, who will bring their wives ( or preferably their mistresses) for the weekend at his expense to witness the spectacle.
Can't say fairer than that really.....
PS. Mosna already has a gym and fitness room up to EU standards. Eugene arranged this direct with the Council of Ministers when one of them made the mistake of coming to Transylvania and subsequently found himself in a compromising situation. Roughly the same thing happened with the mobile phone mast. None of the villages in the area have mobile reception - except Mosna. Some executive was visting the general vicinity and woke up with no clothes on in a house he didn't recognise....
God that tuica's strong.