Monday, December 08, 2008

The way things were

I was hearing that Mr.Fact had assisted an epileptic on the Eurostar the other week, and had been given a free 1st Class return ticket.
The conductor was mostly concerned to know if they would have to stop the train to offload the poor chap. In the event, he simply went to sleep for the rest of the journey and wondered why people were so solicitous of him when he eventually awoke at St.Pancras.
Mrs. Lear was party to the conversation.
"Ha! That's nothing. When I was at school we had a girl who was epileptic."
Now Mrs. Lear was at a small perfectly formed school outside Edinburgh which only catered for young ladies of exceptional quality - at least when they were on their best behaviour and were not beating up all and sundry on the lacrosse field.
"So how did you deal with it?"
" Well we locked her and Wee Jeanie in the library"
Now Wee Jeanie to this day weighs about 120 kgs and she didn't weigh much less when she was 16.
"Why did you do that?"
" Well she used to make a lot of noise and then fall asleep."
"So what was Jeanie for?"
" She used to sit on Epi until she stopped shrieking and fell asleep. And we made Jeanie stay with her until she woke up."
In sure elfnsafety & all sorts of child protection services should be told.

No comments: